Communication is one of the foundations of any healthy marriage. If you’re looking for ways to work on improving your communication with your partner, you have come o the right place.
In this article, you will discover 12 tips on how to improve communication in marriage.
How to Improve Communication in Marriage
People across the country successfully communicate every day with bosses and co-workers in a way that helps improve products and services. They communicate with current and potential customers to increase revenue. They communicate with the grocery store clerk, the bank teller, the doctor and sometimes even strangers.
So, why is it that when people go home to their spouse, communication is a problem? Have you ever asked yourself this question? So have millions of other couples.
Poor communication may be affecting your relationship, but it doesn’t have to anymore. There are things you and your partner can do starting today to improve communication in your marriage. Below are 12 tips to get you started.
1. Learn About Communication Skills
Builders don’t start building houses until they have learned the skills necessary to do so. Doctors do not write treatment plans without having the skills to treat a patient.
While those may seem like extreme examples, the same theory applies to communication. You must first learn the skills of communication before you start trying to implement them.
The best teacher is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Teaching couples how to communicate more effectively is their job. They have education, experience, and a tool bag full of ideas that will improve the way you and your spouse interact.
2. Commit to Improving Communication
You and your partner both need to be on the same page when trying to improve communication in your marriage. If one of you learns the skills but the other refuses, one of you is not going to be happy.
You may spend time and effort to make things better, and you may even see positive progress. But over time, you will start to feel resentful. You will become angry and disappointed that your partner doesn’t care enough to put in an equal amount of time and effort.
However, if you both commit to the process, it shows you both want the marriage to work. It shows you both recognize there is a problem and that your marriage is worthy of fixing the problem.
3. Practice the Skills You Learn
Learning new communication skills is a process that requires patience and a lot of practice. Don’t place expectations that are too high on you or your partner. Working with your therapist, you will have plenty of opportunities to practice and be guided by an expert until you get it right.
4. Practice the Skills You Learn Every Day
Your marriage doesn’t take a day off. Improving your communication should not take a day off either. There are twenty-four hours in a day, giving you multiple opportunities to work on your communication skills with your partner.
Make it your goal to do at least one thing each day that can improve your relationship.
5. Make it Fun
Working on your marriage does not mean you can’t have fun. You can and you should. Get creative with how you improve your communication. Find ways to laugh together. Each time you do something together, you are creating a memory. Why not make it a great memory?
Plus, laughter boosts the serotonin levels, or happy chemicals, in your body and everyone benefits from that.
6. Practice Self-Care
If you love your spouse, you want them to be healthy physically and mentally. You want them to do things that keep them healthy and make them happy, right? You encourage them to attend doctor appointments, quit negative habits and engage in activities that bring fulfillment and increase self-confidence and self-care
You should want the same thing for yourself. Love yourself enough to care about your own mental and physical health. Meet your needs. Doing so will help you become a better partner in your marriage.
7. Encourage Your Partner to Practice Self-Care
Self-care needs to be done by both partners to avoid jealousy and resentment. You don’t want to get a massage or attend an exercise class but deny that opportunity to your spouse.
Neither of you can improve communication if you are not well. Practicing self-care can become something you do together.
8. Don’t Compare Your Communication
Just like it is unhealthy to compare the material things you have with your neighbors or co-workers, comparing communication in your marriage is just as bad. Every relationship is different and will face unique issues, even in how you communicate.
Avoid thinking social media posts or public showings are always the truth in relationships. Typically, people only share the good times, giving a false impression. Focus on your relationship only.
9. Be Intentional
Don’t try to just “wing it” when improving communication in marriage. Make plans and be intentional with how you work with your partner. Set family meeting times each day. Show up with a list of personal questions that will show your partner you care about them and their day. Follow up with them to show you were listening to them in previous conversations. Go the extra mile.
10. Improve All Forms of Communication
Communication no longer means just talking. With technology today you have multiple forms of communication. Use all of them. Text your spouse a loving message, email them a poem, leave a sweet voicemail, write a sexy note.
11. Argue, But Do It Respectfully
Every single couple on the planet disagrees at some point in their relationship. Or at least they should. Two individuals from different backgrounds will differ and that is okay. The way you argue is what’s important.
Your therapist can teach you how to argue so that you both get what you want, and you both feel loved before, during and after the disagreement.
12. Start Today
The last tip on how to improve communication in a marriage is to start now. Don’t wait for a better time because there is no better time to give your relationship the attention it deserves. Contact your partner, express your love for them, and commit to working on your communication.
Then, enjoy your life as your relationship flourishes.