The definition of family has evolved over the last few decades. A family was once referred to as 22parents, children, and siblings. Today, family represents those who share deep bonds and commitment and may include partners, grandparents, parents, step-parents, siblings by blood or marriage, extended family, and friends.
How well a family functions depends on the health of each family member. Also, the family is viewed as a whole emotional unit that can influence the behaviors of each member. This is the basis for the family system theory developed by Murray Bowen, who recognized individuals could not be separated from their network of relationships. He claims that the behavior of one family member can influence the way a family functions over time.
For example, if one member of a family has a substance use disorder, over time, the actions of the entire family seem to revolve around that member. Family systems therapy can work with drug and alcohol issues, as well as with mental health disorders.
How Family Systems Therapy Works
According to Bowen, it’s essential to examine the family history as a whole before beginning in-depth treatment. He created a genogram, a pictorial timeline of every family member and their psychological and medical histories. This helps in discussing how genetics play a role in both physical and mental health.
Several different approaches to family systems therapy stem from family therapeutic concepts developed by theorists, including structural, strategical, and intergenerational.
Structural Family Therapy
Observing the family during a therapy session can be very helpful to a licensed marriage and family counselor. It allows them to see how family members interact with one another, the hierarchy of the family. If the family is the system, they can observe the sub-systems of siblings, grandparents, parents, step members, and so on. Understanding the family’s structure can help a therapist choose beneficial activities that promote healing and growth, like role-playing.
Strategic Family Therapy
Strategic family therapy focuses on how the family behaves outside of the counseling sessions. Families are given relational strategies to implement when challenges arise. Teaching the family methods of interaction can make solving problems quicker and more effective.
Intergenerational Family Therapy
Bowen created this technique to show families how ancestors' behavior patterns and reactions to problems can be handed down. It is what has always been done; therefore, it must continue, even if it is unhealthy. Changing this belief is essential to healing the family system. For example, if your great grandfather disciplined with physical abuse, then your grandfather learned to abuse when disciplining physically, then your father learned to discipline with abuse. They do not know yet that there are other
ways to discipline. Breaking this cycle of intergenerational beliefs and behaviors can be done in family systems therapy.
Concepts Behind Family Systems Theory
Bowen claims there are reasons behind the way families interact emotionally. When siblings fight and don’t speak for years, there is a reason why. When the oldest sibling takes on a parental role, there are reasons why.
• Self
While family systems therapy is primarily about the family, it is also essential to have a self-identity separate from the family to avoid problems such as codependency.
• Emotional Triangles
Relationships occur between two people. Each person can form another relationship with someone outside the original one. This new addition is an emotional triangle. Bowen believes changes in any triangle created can impact all other triangles in the family system.
• Cutoff Emotionally
To cut off someone emotionally means to distance yourself emotionally. It does not mean you cut someone out of your life. Even if you did, they could still influence you emotionally. Bowen theorized work could be done to give the relationship less power. This allows a connection to exist but does not cause so much stress in your life.
• Sibling Position
The sibling position concept refers to how the oldest, middle, and youngest siblings and only children function in a family. When working with intimate partners, this can be an excellent concept to review.
• Nuclear Family Emotional Process
Bowen claims there are two central people, a couple, and emotional responses may affect them in one of four ways: cutting themselves off emotionally or distancing themselves, fighting in the marriage, one spouse getting sick or becomes unable to function, or the marriage problems get projected onto the children, which is also a concept.
• Family Projection Process
When parents argue but cannot adequately express themselves, they may take out their emotions on others. The feelings of anxiety and anger are misplaced on the child. Parents do not usually do this intentionally or hurt their children; it is usually an unconscious response.
• Multigenerational Transmission Process
Traits of the parents are passed down to their children generationally. Bowen believes if parents take time now to work on themselves, they will pass down healthy thinking, feeling, and acting patterns.
Getting healthy now will lead to future healthy generations. Your grandchildren’s children will benefit from the improvements you make now emotionally.
• Societal Emotional Process
Society as a whole has emotions. The COVID pandemic showed just how emotional our country could get. We fought over toilet paper rather than tried to make sure everyone was safe and okay. Bowen recognized that the emotions of our society influence the emotions of family units.
There are many reasons to seek family systems therapy, including overcoming substance use disorders, improving communication, coping with the death of a loved one, and functioning better overall. A family member may be struggling with a mental health disorder, and it is affecting everyone. Or, external issues like job stress or financial problems are causing problems in your relationships.
Family systems therapy seems complex, but when provided by a licensed therapist, the steps fall into place, and you make significant progress. It can improve how your family’s individual needs contribute to the positive health of the entire group. Your family is worth doing what it takes to heal. Reach out today to start family systems therapy with your loved ones.