The Effects of Alcoholism on the Family

Have you ever called in sick to work because you are too hungover or too drunk to perform your job duties? You may think that is okay; you have got sick days built up so you will still get paid for the day. However, at the office, your co-workers are forced to complete some of your tasks or take on extra work that would have been your responsibility.

Your skipping work can create a domino effect. Deadlines get missed, customers become dissatisfied, the company loses. Your drinking affected your employer. 

The same effect can happen to your family members too.

Currently, over 14 million Americans suffer from alcohol use disorder. Because families usually consist of more than two members, that means there are well over 28 million Americans also suffering from alcoholism.

Keep reading to learn about common ways alcoholism affects families. If you recognize any of these happening in your family, it is time to make some positive changes. Below, you will also learn how to start making these changes today.

Alcoholism Effects Children

Your drinking may harm any child in your life. Research has shown children of alcoholics struggle in school academically and socially. Some children may become perfectionistic, while others will act out by skipping school or being defiant.

Some children may choose to use drugs or alcohol as an outlet for their emotions they cannot express or to try and fit in with the wrong crowd. It is this feeling of belonging they desperately need but are not getting from you.

When discussing how the disease of alcoholism affects children, we are talking about children of all ages. Adult children of alcoholics struggle too. From having difficulty forming positive relationships, struggle with gaining independence, and can be inappropriately over or under-reactive to situations.

Alcoholism Affects Family Relationships

If you are struggling with overusing alcohol, then you have likely already had fights with family members. They claim you have a problem; you claim you do not. You have done things while drinking that destroyed the trust and respect in your relationships. You may have allowed a verbal fight to escalate into a physical battle.

You may not realize it, but your alcoholism has created hardships for your family members. You have neglected them, taken advantage of them, and made them feel like you care more for the alcohol than you do for them.

Alcoholism can turn your relationship into a one-sided union, leading to a massive rift in your relationships. The ones you love cannot handle being the only one trying to make your relationship work, and eventually, they may need to leave the relationship.

Alcoholism Effects Family Finances

It is incredibly unfair for an alcoholic to spend money meant to meet family needs on substances. Often, money spent on alcohol could have gone to pay rent or utilities, food, clothing, gas for the vehicle, or other necessities.

The more alcohol you need, the more money you spend. Financial problems are one of the top reasons for divorce today. If the economic problems are due to alcoholism, it can be even harder on families.

Drinking too much also lowers inhibitions, making it easier for you to spend money on useless items or activities. For example, someone drinking too much may be more likely to gamble. Financial struggles are common among alcoholic families.

There are many other costs of addiction.

Alcoholism Effects of Mental Health

Alcoholism is a brain disorder. It is an addiction that can damage your brain chemistry. At first, alcohol appears to boost the happy chemicals in your brain. However, it doesn’t take long for you to notice alcohol is more of a depressant.

Alcoholics have often suffered from mental health disorders like depression and anxiety.

Alcoholism also affects the mental health of your family members.

Your family can experience post-traumatic stress disorder just by witnessing your behaviors when you are drinking. If you become abusive when you drink, they may develop severe anxiety or panic, fearful of how they will be treated by you each day.

Your drinking habits can affect the self-esteem of your children, spouse, and other family members. They may feel they are less worthy of your attention and neglected. Neglect can be just as abusive and damaging than a verbal or physical altercation.

Another major mental health disorder associated with alcoholism is co-dependency when one family member enables the addiction of the person abusing substances.

Co-dependent behaviors include an excessive desire to please other people. Co-dependent family members will do anything to please you, anything. They may also have a hard time making decisions because they lack confidence in themselves. Further, they struggle with identifying their feelings. 

Co-dependent family members are not good at communicating their feelings, either. They prefer to be told what to do rather than risk being seen as "bad" or "weak" or "dumb." These are words co-dependents may use in conversations with themselves, leading to further self-esteem issues. 

Make Positive Changes

Alcoholism affects family members, but it is also a very fixable problem. There are numerous resources available today, even during these times of the corona virus. You don’t have to be sober to start making changes either.

The first thing you can do is admit your alcoholism is effecting your family negatively. Then, seek help from someone who has experience in healing you and your family from your addiction.

Reach out to an addiction specialist who can help you develop a treatment plan that allows you to get sober in the best way for your whole family.  

While you are getting help for addiction, your family needs to get help for their issues. Some family members may need to overcome co-dependency, post-traumatic stress, anxiety, depression, or substance abuse problems. A licensed family therapist who specializes in addiction will help you see significant changes in a short time. 

You and your family deserve a long, healthy, fun life together. It is never too late to start working towards that goal.